On Role Models

I had a very insightful conversation with a coworker today in which I mentioned that I wanted to be a doctor because I admired my father from childhood & I started a business bc I was inspired by my mother's "go get it" mindset. (She is of course the greatest to ever do it). We were talking about children needing role models in life and how she wished her parents were hers. She hates that kids have to look outside the home for role models these days. She was shocked when I told her that my parents are my role models and life models in general. (We were talking about children needing role models in life and how she thought it strange that kids have to look outside the home for role models these days). But in that moment of seeing the look of confusion (maybe astonishment) on her face, I realized that most children DON'T see their parents as their role models! They may see them as great people, or strong people or great parents etc but why not as a role model? There must be a missing link somewhere.

My admiration for my parents come from the values that they hold, and taught me. They raised me by example, and thus by seeing them lead exemplary lives it caused me to want to embody all of it. Now I'm not saying I agreed completely with everything they did or said and want to be a replica, What I'm simply saying is that I look up to them greatly & hold them (their advice, their opinions etc) in thee highest regard. I am yet to see a celebrity more beautiful than my mother, or a professional more wealthy than my father & I mean that in the most honest of ways. I use the words "beautiful" & "wealthy" not in their superficial definition but to show that those characteristics mean more when they are not merely physical, and inner qualities possess a ton more value than the physical.

"Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day." 2 Corinthians 4:16

"but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:4

While no parent is perfect, if there must be a role model to be had, then by God's grace I will be my child's (earthly) role model as I point them to One who is much greater than I and lead them to accept Him (Christ) as their personal Lord & Savior. Personally I would be hurt if someone were to ask my child "who is your role model?" and their response is "Michael Jordan", or "Spiderman", or "MLK" or "Beyonce"? HECK NO. They didn't raise you! LOL


Grace & PEACE.

WHOA!

There was no way I could go without blogging about my day today.

Fact: I am currently going through the toughest season of my life. I have likened it to an ongoing  nightmare that I cannot wake up from, no matter what I do. It's tough to go thru this as a christian because (some won't admit it but) we feel like this walk is a bed of roses and God just hands you whatever you want, keeping every storm at bay and you happy, one little mini test here and there,  "blessed and highly favored" chilling in la la land etc.

NEWSFLASH: "Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted," 

2 Tim 3:12.

Persecution = suffering, adversity, hardship, discomfort, affliction. 

But I didn't really come to terms with this that quickly. I kicked and I screamed and I cried and I got angry and I tried to pray it away, i mean I DID EVERYTHING, and yet my trial still remains. I am not writing because it is over, I am writing because God was faithful to finally give me some perspective and understanding on what is going on via: 

James 1:2-4: 

2 My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. 4 But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.

You see God is perfecting me. Idk what for but since the beginning of this year He has been showing me through scripture, people, sermons, prophecies, events, etc that I am about to move into a new season. No idea why i thought it would be a smooth transition. Anyways, NOW I can rejoice in this hard, VERY HARD time because I know it is not in vain. God is pruning me and making me more Christ-like. Of course, my initial instinct was to RUN LIKE THEEEE WIND but according to this verse, I must let patience have its PERFECT work, its the only way I will become perfect and complete, and idk about you but I anticipate that outcome.

Sooooooo, In one day of being in God's presence, I went from afraid, to sad, to bawling my eyes out in prayer and pain, to complete JOY! That's what the presence of the Lord can do! I literally forsook everything, food, workout, errands to stay in his presence today until He helps me and just as he promised, He came through!

All i have to do now is trust Him, persevere, endure and let Him lead  because I will come out victorious by God's grace alone.

Seems easy enough. ^_^

grace & PEACE.

lovestory? nah.

I made a "things I want in my future husband" list once, well that ship has sailed and I am glad it did. As I began to grow in grace, God began to teach me about love, His love; Through trials, tests, failures, strengths, accomplishments, chastisement, discipline, punishments and every way imaginable.

But I digress.

Back to my list, I realized after reading a book my sister recommended to me (Boy meets girl by Joshua Harris) that my ideals about my future spouse were all wrong! I went waaaaaay back in my journal to read it &.........*Cue the beginning of me letting go of the list.* Mind you this was weeks ago.

But for some reason, love has been on my mind a whole lot lately which is bonkers because I'm the most "un-mushy" person in this world so yeah, I was confused too. Daydreaming about what my wedding will be like, what my husband will look like, our careers, our children, our hobbies... I even sounded out potential last names that I may have to take on. (lmbo). It became difficult to bear. 

Anyways, today while at the hospital praying with my family, my mother said something that struck me. She said:

"When your father and I were getting married, I went to go make the invitations/program & was trying to come up with a quote to put on there. Most people would want to put things like "love is this, love is that" but I asked God what should be the foundation of this marriage/family and he said to me "JESUS IS LORD" so I put it on the card. & ever since then those words have truly been our foundation and will continue to be. "

On the drive home, my ideas of a "love story" began to take on a new definition. I no longer wanted a love story that makes me weak in the knees, but I now wanted a God story, where God is kept FRONT & CENTER. One that keeps me on my knees in prayer drawing me ever close to God. I want my God story to point people to the Cross and lead people to salvation. I want my wedding to not only be a celebration but an outreach where Christ is placed on a pedestal, not my groom or I. I want my marriage to be a ministry in which we both are on fire for God and his service. Where we serve together, always. Where my heart to serve God is challenged to a higher level. I want my God story to cause others to seek God genuinely and serve Him. I want our God story to blow people's minds not because of who we are or our accomplishments but because of who GOD is. I don't want a self centered love story where we glorify each other and talk each other up but one where we both glorify God and constantly thank Him for leading us to one another so that we may better fulfill His will and our purpose on this Earth.

Of course I want some of the mushy stuff too but those things are secondary, mere benefits, and will come naturally to a God story written by the author of Love himself.

However first, my singleness must be a ministry in itself & I get that. God please, please teach me, break me, mold me and conform me more and more to your will so that I may be prepared for what lies ahead.

Amen.

Things I've learned in the past year:

1. GOD. IS. FAITHFUL. yes there were times I doubted, yes there were times I worried and yes I was wrong on all counts but "If we believe not, yet he abideth faithful: he cannot deny himself." 2 Tim 2:13

2. Studying the Bible with a group of like-minded believers is so beneficial. I've grown so much from our online weekly Bible studies via oovoo or google hangout, thank God for godly friends! "Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend" Prov 27:17

3. Do your own research! Find out for yourself! Think for yourself! No one is without opinion, why not form your own?(with the help of the Holy Spirit) This is a huge one. Get in your Bible and make sure that word or advice, admonition, doctrine etc lines up with scripture; Even in your secular life, do your own scholarly research concerning the foods you eat, medicines you take etc. 

4. Paying extra for quality or designer is SO worth it. There was a time when all my clothes, shoes, bags, accessories were from F21, Charlotte Russe, and basically any cheap fast fashion retailer you could think of. The result of that was throwing/giving away bags of clothes every other month or so. I took my mothers advice and invested in what I wore, not only do they last longer, they are timeless. This also goes for food. stop buying cheap frozen dinners and snacks from walmart and eating junk, processed fast foods. Invest in quality food too!

5. INVEST IN YOUR SELF. Spiritually, Physically and emotionally. God wants us to be in good health and of a good mind, and of course following after holiness and seeking after HIs Kingdom. Make sure your priorities are in order; Your service & commitment to God then the rest will follow. Your health is also important, presenting your body as a living sacrifice doesn't just pertain to what goes on it but what goes in it. "Your lamb shall be without blemish, a male of the first year: ye shall take it out from the sheep, or from the goats:" Exodus 12:5, if God wouldn't accept animals with blemish how much more man, who He created in his image? Yes, sickness may come but we should not bring it upon ourselves, eating however and whatever. God has filled the earth with foods that are delicious and nutritious so that we may partake in appropriate amounts and quantities. Prov 23:20-21- Gluttony is a sin because it is a lack of self control in our eating. As believers we are called to moderation and self control. If we cannot control the physical in what we eat, we will also not be able to control our anger, lust, etc. Self-control starts in the heart and is a fruit of the spirit.

6. As you grow spiritually, your convictions will change towards certain things. 

7. Ok so this one I found myself doing a lot when I started following Christ. I wanted everyone to see what I saw and believe what i believe. Never, ever, neverevernever argue the word of God with someone else, whether believer or unbeliever. "Of these things put them in remembrance, charging them before the Lord that they strive not about words to no profit,but to the subverting of the hearers." 2 Tim 2:14. If speaking about the Word with an unbeliever, make sure the aim and purpose is to bring him to the saving knowledge of Christ, not to convince him that the bible is true. "For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God. 1 Cor. 1:18" A person who is not a Christian may know many facts about the Bible. However, such a person cannot gain illumination, which only the Holy Spirit provides, about biblical texts. (Read more here)

Another seemingly dark season..

Have you ever felt like you world is falling apart and yet also, coming together? You ever felt like your life was at a stand still but at the same time knew you were almost at the top of the roller coaster about to hit full speed ahead? That's me. Right now and boy oh boy its tough. Patience is the hardest part, not knowing is second to that because feelings are not fact. For all I know this feeling could last the next couple of months, years (though I pray they don't.) I wrote in my journal the other day that I am in the middle of the biggest faith walk of my life. The devil came for me in so many ways, messing with my mind, my business and my family although I fought it along the way, I could feel it wearing me down.

But enough of the bad news! Here is the good news! I have felt so much growth in my life in areas that I thought would never happen. God continues to draw me closer to himself by speaking through so many different sources and different times. HE IS AWESOME & HE IS ABLE!

I cannot wait to give my testimony out of this situation so that His name may be glorified!